Everything Was All About Me

 i would never want to be won by the conversation of the wives. -1 Peter 3:1]  i'd rather obey the Word, not caring whether or not anybody is submissive to me or not.  i never ever thought about whether or not the apostles were married or not.  i always assumed they were all like Paul who never indicated whether he had a wife or not.  It's amazing what different information there is on this subject online.  The only commanding officer i care now to fall in line under is Jesus.  And i know there's a big difference between Jesus in the flesh and Jesus the son of God.  Knowing what i know now, i'd fall into line under Him in either case.

If i had had a wife during my life, would she have been supportive of me? i had my own self-image problems and the inability to think about anybody but myself, i would've made a poor husband.  Everything was all about me.  i know i had that trait and that makes it easier to pick it up from somebody else including my own mother which is why we didn't speak for five years. There was a time when i never sensed her support.  i would've been the same way with a son or a daughter, so i'm sure there was a purpose in God's plan to keep me single all my life.  i would be head of a family of folks constantly pushing away from each other.

"Woman!  You are not to assume authority over me!  Take your control-freak resentment and crawl back to your crab-bucket!"  i know exactly who i would say that to.  My wife.  Yet i'm at fault for perceiving a lot lately that i have yet another enemy to fight.  Imagine if i'd been married with children--the enemy would've been under the same roof.