Heart, Soul, and Strength

 Why boast about giving anything? i'm not here to impress men  i'm here for God to know my heart when i sit down to His Word each morning.  i trust Him to give me the right nudge and wisdom to perceive what He wants me to get according to His will. -- [Proverbs 25:14]  i've had my fill of clubs, swords, and sharp arrows.  i must make myself worthy of getting clubbed, pierced, and struck.  Lord, teach me to become 100% responsible for the energy i seem to be attracting lately.-- [Proverbs 25: 18]   In a world of deception, be honest...Jesus is ONLY, ALWAYS, AND FOREVER true.  He always leads me to the truth and the life so i will know true freedom.  In a world of the end, be determined.  In a time of persecution, lawlessness, lovelessness, and tribulation, even those who profess to be Christians will fall away.   …But he who endures to the end shall be saved.  --[Matthew 24: 13]  i must prepare to minister, prepar...

 Turn me ahead facing Your direction, Lord, like You did yesterday when Satan blew his shofar.  A man who wanders from the way of understanding will rest in the assembly of the dead. -- [Proverbs 21: 16]  i've loved gin, vodka, tobacco, and weed long enough and certainly didn't get rich from them. ---[v. 17]  Let me shut my door and pray to my Father who is in the secret place.  i know the walking definition of a counterfeit Christian.  i cannot and will not mess with the Lord who holds the keys to hell.  We Christians must endure to the end.   Why should i feel uncertain or insecure?  i am with Christ and the Holy Spirit has His hand on my heart.  i need not worry about my shortness of breath and the left side of my heart not pumping at full capacity.  i'm prepared to go home when He calls me home.  Should i die on His earth, then i'll live in His new earth.  His guiding Star and Shepherd has watch over me....

 Forgive me, Lord, i will always be far from pure and very pleased not to be proud in my eyes.  If my heart were so clean i wouldn't need all this medication.  i know You are the best cardiologist i'll ever have.  i wait for You, Lord, even though You have already saved me.  Keep me shielded from those with a flattering tongue, the born strokers, and those who raise suspicion in a multiplication of words.  Make me aware of others and their delivery systems.  i've thought my heart was once in Hartford, CT until about a year ago, watching from my motel room window somebody minding his own business talking on his cellphone while walking to a bus stop and getting struck violently on the side of the head.  i wish i had had the foresight to carry down a bag of ice with me when i ran down to check on him to see if he was all right.  He didn't seem to be that shaken over it, like it was just a part of every day.  You wanted me to be a witness to...

  Though I walk in the midst of trouble You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand Against the wrath of my enemies, And Your right hand will save me. --[Psalm 134: 7] i know that You will ake perfect whatever occupies my mind -- [Psalm 134: 8]  It's not good for my soul to be without knowledge; i only please Satan when i speak and do without thinking things through.--[Proverbs 19: 2]  i must focus on God's power and sovereignty  rather than approaching Him with that "woe is me." "...O Lord God of our fathers, are You not God in heaven and do You not rule over all the kingdoms of the nations, and in Your hand is there not power and might, so that no one is able to withstand You?  If disaster comes upon us--sword, judgment, pestilence, or famine--we will stand before this temple and in Your presence (for Your name is in this temple), and cry out to You in our affliction, and you will hear and save. --[2 Chronicles 20: 6, 9] Your name is on my lips; Yo...

 May the peace of God guard my heart and mind through Jesus Christ and since Jesus knows that God brings me this peace beyond my understanding, He will test my heart to ensure His Father's peace is effectively keeping me focused and seeking the kingdom.  Keeping out anything that's intrusive, keeping Satan at bay and continuing down the hallway and out the door to reside in the garbage bin outside.  Let me stand back and watch You work through Your glory; for a change i can say, "it's not about me." Keep me away from the ways of the wicked, for i know they are an abomination to you -[Proverbs 15:8]  Keep me civil-minded and don't let me fall into the toilet when the neighbors slam down their commode seat again and again and over and over.  Keep me from busting my own seat when i slam mine down in retaliation.  Keep my prayer for peace upright and to Your delight.  How many times this past year have i been so displaced, a stranger in a foreign land even...

 Lord, i pray that You would keep R. healthy and feeling energized and kept awake.  Keep Your loving hand over him.  In Jesus' name.  Amen i must remember to pray for my brother, my community, my Journey, and even for those who anger me and perform adversarial roles on this journey so i can allow the Spirit of God to work through me so that i can show Jesus to the world.  i don't want to short circuit what God wants to do, so i must pray.  i must talk to Him on my walks, like i did this morning and look what happened.  i had a credit to my bill.  i hadn't known about it, so now i can invest in more resources that'll help me praise God more. O Lord, take that Jezebel spirit from C., totally eradicate it from her.  It's her i adore, it's that spirit i despise.  Rise up, Lord!  Dissipate the spirit that separates her from You.  Help her to walk the walk with Jesus and not just talk the talk about Jesus; and as i pray this, Lord, h...

 Dear Lord, forgive me, i'm still a child of fantasy.  i need to grow and mature as a Christian.  i need to stop with the doublemindedness.  When i say i'm going to lay a problem at Your feet, then i've got to discipline myself to put all my human trust in You and keep my hands off a situation and keep remembering that You are at the helm while i'm Your copilot, not the other way around. i'm still a child of fantasy.  Help me to keep my focus on You, for You are the most important One in my life!!!  May i talk with You the most of every day.  My dear Lord and Savior Jesus, i now recognize that while You spent Your time on this earth, You depended on the Father, help me to follow in Your footsteps and do the same, in Your name. Faith does the impossible because it brings God to undertake for us, and nothing is impossible with God. -- E. M. Bounds My muscles and energy may be waning now at 66, but that doesn't matter now.  i can build my faith ...

 First the Word, and then the Creation.  Dear Lord, scatter me.  i know that i could live through three generations, me being in my third right now.  i've been in exile most of my life, each exile seeming to begin at the end of a generation, which would've made it 1979, 2005, and if things play out my next exile, if i live that long, will be in 2031.  About every 26 years or so, there's a new exile, a new journey.  Scatter me, even if it's to the farthest end of the earth.  Gather me and bring me where it is You will for me to be.  Right now, i have no idea where you want to go be.  Do i go or do i stay?  Give me the patience to wait for Your answer and please take the fight out of me now because i still feel rebellious and in exile.   Dear Lord, give me the wisdom to walk out of this dwelling quietly focusing on the life and location You've chosen for me, so that i can better serve You, so i can volunteer my time and energy to...

 Heavenly Father, Help me to keep my focus on Your greatness and Your goodness and give me more opportunities to bless and help others.  Keep me ever aware of Your presence and always aware of evil people.  Help me to judge them not.  Show me the perfect opportunities to present my testimony and may it be a bright light in this dark world.   Okay i've got a confession. i'm always suspicious of pastors and televangelists when they write or preach about going to church and being a part of a congregation.  They have to say that.  They have congregations of their own putting money in their plates.  So, yeah, naturally they're going to say that because they want their congregations to return each and every Sunday to justify their existence; to justify the filling up of their massive space.  i'd rather meet the needs of someone who has fallen down the steps outside achurch or in the library. i'm not excited about sharing my space and time when...

Forgive me, Lord, i'm still slipping.  You who are so omniscient knew what i was going to do before i came out of my mother's womb.  i have created my own idols and have developed a habit just as addictive as the cigarettes and marijuana were.  You cleaned me of those addictions, so clean this idolatry out of me because i want to be Your worthy servant, Lord.  i know that repentance is an ongoing process, that i don't repent once and i'm fixed.  i know it'll take the rest of my earthly days at least to get through this process.  None it shall come to pass when all these things come upon you, the blessing and the curse which I have set before you, and you call them to mind among all the nations where the Lord your God drives you, and you return to the Lord your God and obey His voice, according to all that I command you today, you and your children, with all your heart and with all your soul.  The Lord your God will make you abound in all the work of yo...

 i trust You and follow You as my Lord and Savior.  Help me to tell others why i follow You so that it opens up doors and possibilities and opportunities for them to follow You as well.  i have gone the distance from darkness to light.  Your Living Word is my living hope.  i know You'll see fit to turn my pains away.  Thank You for the times You've made intercession for me with groans that couldn't be uttered. Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses.  For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. -- [Romans 8: 26] You must be doing a lot of translating at night when i'm groaning and moaning in my sleep.  i need a lot of intercession, my Lord.  i know i've done that for years because i can hear people mocking me through the walls.  Thank You for tolerating my involuntary prayers. Draw near to God and He will draw near to y...

 God, You are stronger than the evil this Jezebel spirit has bred.  What can i do to show more faith, Father?  i am growing weary of this place.  Surely You don't want me to endure much longer. " You're safe.  Trust Me.  Everything is going to be okay." It's up to You now to find me a new road to travel.  Keep Your promise and take care of me, i will keep my promise.  i will be Your faithful son.  Take the evil out of the heart of Jezebel; her heart has been corrupted to the point of breeding her own corruption.  Blind her hatred and resentments with Your love.  Fill my heart with peace and give me the mental clarity i need.  If my call is to be the light of the world, attempting to the best of my ability and with the help of my Lord and Savior to bring others from darkness to light, then help me, Lord, to abide in You.  If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face and turn from ...

 i am Your child.  Keep me from hurting myself and separating myself from You.  Keep loving and forgiving those who i can't seem to be able to love or forgive and forgive me for not being able to love and forgive.  Help me open my heart even further to You so that i can open up my heart to others.  Drain all the fight and all the anger from me. Please cleanse those who are haunted by Jezebel spirits and take any reasons for them out of their hearts and consciousness.  Nourish their souls with a deeper relationship with You and not a "counterfeit Christian' relationship; keep me from becoming a counterfeit Christian and help me build a deeper relationship with You so that i myself can avoid any Jezebel spirit to poison me. Help me to mouth the words i'm writing so i'm convinced that i'm really saying them so that negative energy will not come calling.  So that the devil and his demons will not come calling.  Help me keep the devil away while i wait...

 i encourage you to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior because He is coming, right around the corner.  Let me be your Barnabas.  Do you feel like you're fading into the background?  Just want to settle down in your hometown?  Or do you want to move on?  Do you want to embed yourself in your current status quo, engulfed in your intellectualism, professors professing nothing? Maybe i can come and get you along with me into the ministry.  i know i couldn't go it alone anymore.  i need the Holy Spirit to be with me from here on out.  i don't have any ambition for being a big shot. i see Jezebel.  Catering to creepy culprits.  And that's a reflection on her who keeps breeding contempt and corruption catering to creepy culprits.  Barnabas gave up his place in history to save Mark for the kingdom of God.  Lord, open a door for me to say something about Christ.  Let me let everyone know that the Word of God is not ch...

 i have seen too many people on the Universal Church website who shield themselves with intellictualism instead of relying on the shield from God's favor.  i can still hear the voice of my dad as he instructs me; i can still imagine my mother watching over me, though they could be both a graceful ornament on my head and chains about my neck back in the day--[Proverbs 1:9]   It's time to bring this stay in MA to a logical conclusion; i've hung out here long enough.  i feel the nudge of the Lord, the instruction of dad, the looks of mother, and i'm trying to soak it all in on this first day of September, which to me has always been the start of a new school year and new beginnings.  The Lord nudges me, warning me to be a good steward with His money; and for me, there shall be no calamity, for i shall obey the Lord, remember the instruction of dad and the warning looks from my mother. i love knowledge and wisdom from the Lord and i'm willing and able to take H...